She’s In Safe Hands

I’ve been struggling this week with the fact that I am becoming more flexible in my mindset and starting to believe and trust in people and things that I would not have done in the past (because it never would have felt safe – rejection/abandonment fears 🙄). It’s an uncomfortable feeling. I’m trying to balance two polar opposites in my mind at the same time (as usual – dialectics eh?!). These are that I do not like the feeling of trusting someone or believing there might be a future for me… but I can’t seem to help doing it anyway. Which scares me and makes me hopeful at the same time… as I said, dialectics! You’ll see a lot on this subject area this week methinks!

Amazing how a brain can be wired to be experience what are generally accepted to be positive emotions (love, trust, hope) as incredibly negative at times, because it simply bypasses the good feeling and jumps straight to the anticipation of losing the good feeling!

Art Journal Sketch Series. Watercolour Pencil on Paper. ©Katy Matilda Neo, 2017.